


Jar Jar/Julia: The Phantoms of Carnage

by lordhadrian



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Dark Castle, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-31
Updated: 2015-03-31
Packaged: 2018-03-20 13:03:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3651351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lordhadrian/pseuds/lordhadrian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jar Jar Binks and Queen Julia of Bardotta enjoy a nice picnic, but they are drawn to an old castle and trapped by an evil spirit of a Dagoyan named Carnage.  jar Jar must struggle to ave Julia and himself from deadly phantoms and ghoulish tricks.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jar Jar/Julia: The Phantoms of Carnage

**Author's Note:**

> Just a cute romance for Jar Jar Binks. I wrote it to test the waters, since few people write Fan fiction for Jar Jar Binks, so this is territory ripe for adventure.
> 
> I know Jar Jar is not everyone's cup of tea. I wrote this for Jar Jar fans to enjoy and to dive into Jar Jar fiction.

JarJar/Julia: Phantoms of Carnage!

It was the perfect day for Jar Jar Binks and Queen Julia of Bardotta as they sat down in the fields to enjoy their picnic.

Julia smiled and bit into her dainty salad while Jar Jar sipped wine and marveled at the beauty of the Bardottan forests nearby.

"Dissa being so muy muy grand! Bombad nice!" he smiled at her.

Julia was completely enthralled in him, but was also distracted by her little furry pet Mufu.

Mufu hopped around and sort of barked with tail wagging as they ate food.

Julia giggled as she dropped pink grapes into Jar Jar's mouth.

Jar Jar looked around and saw an ancient castle nearby.

"Oook, looky looky! Looks a little spooky spooky!" He joked.

Julia frowned a little.

"It IS a spooky place. It is Castle Carnage!"

Jar Jar was a little startled by her fear, but waved it off.

"Castle be needin a little worky on its pretty bits. Why it be looking so old?"

"It is haunted! By the spirit of Lord Carnage." Julia ate her food with caution. "Carnage was a terrible Dagoyan lord who had powers, magical powers. and he loved icky things like bugs and crawly things!"

"Oooh, spooky!" Jar Jar smiled and kissed her "No needin to be scared. I am here. I can fight off the spooky spookies and crawly crawlies!"

Julia giggled and kissed him back.

"You are my hero, Jar Jar!"

Suddenly Mufu ran off towards the castle. Julia started to panic.

"MUFU!! get back here! Jar Jar, my little Mufu is running towards Castle Carnage! We must get him!"

Jar Jar stood up and smiled as he plucked one more grape with his tongue.

"No worries. I will get him back." Jar Jar ran after Mufu, with Julia following from behind.

"MUFU! Come back! MUFU!!" Julia gasped as her little furry Mufu ran into the castle, the ancient door was slightly ajar.

Jar Jar, not paying attention to Julia's fear, ran into the castle after Mufu.

"STOP, JARA JAR!!" Julia tried to get him to leave.

They were in a great hall, where an old throne sat at the end of the room. A dinner table was there, with old plates and goblets, as if the castle were abandoned during a feast.

Mufu ran up to Jar Jar and wagged its tail, as if had been playing a game with them.

Jar Jar smiled, but Julia was terrified.

"Ja Jar, we must get out of here! If Carnage traps us, we will be doomed!"

Jar Jar smiled "No problemo! The door is right there. Let's go."

"Watch where you step! Carnage loved bugs, and when somebody killed a bug in his castle, he had them put to death! Don't step on any bugs!" Julia warned.

Jar Jar looked. There were no bugs on the floor. He smiled a goofy smile.

"No problemo!"

A small flying bugged whined near Jar Jar's ear. Instinctively, he tried to wave it off as they walked slowly to the door. The bugged landed on his face and he smacked it dead with his hand. A ghostly laugh bellowed through the castle. The doors and windows slammed shut, trapping them in the castle.

"Uh-oh..." Jar Jar muttered "Weesa gots a problemo...."

Julia held onto him in terror.

"That's the laugh of Carnage!" They backed away towards the throne.

An evil looking Bardottan appeared, much like a Force Ghost. He laughed at them.

"You shall die the eternal death, forever haunted by friend and foe alike!" he bellowed and vanished.

"Jar Jar, I'm scared!" Julia held onto him

Jar Jar looked around as scary noises creeked from all over the castle.

"What heesa mean haunted by the friend and foe?" jar Jar looked around.

He spotted Anakin, smiling at him.

"Hey, Jar Jar. Time to die!" Anakin drew out his light saber and walked towards him.

Jar Jar and Julia ran through the castle hallways, past dark corridors and cobwebs everywhere.

They ran into Count Dooku!

"Now, you shall be eliminated!" Dooku boomed out in his deep voice.

"BJORK! Weesa gotta run dis way!!" Jar Jar grabbed Julia's hand and went down another corridor.

They ran into an evil looking Mace Windu!

"Senator Binks! You are about to-"

Jar Jar screamed and ran in another direction with Julia "Weesa get it!! Weesa be dead and stuff! Whena yoosa just be shutting up!!!???"

 

They entered a room filled with swords and other weapons.

"Oooh, looky looky! Pointy things!" He grabbed a sword and swung it around a little.

"Jar Jar, no one has ever lasted more than a day in castle Carnage. I think we are doomed." Julia felt despair.

But Jar Jar smiled at her. "Weesa got a grand looking sword. Meesa think we can do something. Weesa be getting out of here."

Dooku appeared behind Jar Jar and was about to attack him.

"How can we escape?" Julia asked.

"My don't know."

Jar Jar shrugged, waving his his arms out. Still holding his sword, he struck the Phantom Dooku and destroyed him.

The Phantom Dooku screamed as he vanished. Jar Jar turned with surprise "Did Meesa do that? Muy good!"

Jar Jar and Julia ran through the corridors and ran into a demonic looking C3PO.

"I am fluent in over six million forms of murder!" C3PO lumbered at them.

"YIPES!" Jar Jar panicked and flailed around. His sword sliced the demon

C3PO in half, causing the phantom to vanish!

They ran some more, back into the main hall.

Jar Jar and Julia were surrounded by other Phantoms. Anakin, Grievous, Mace Windu, Ahsoka Tano, Asajj Ventress, Nute Gunray, and Darth Maul.

"PUDU!!" Jar Jar tried to charge at them, but slipped on an old dinner plate on the floor. He slid around off balance from the heavy sword, and by accident sliced up each Phantom that tried to attack him.

"Oh Jar Jar! Look out!!" Julia cried out

"OOOoh!! Meesa got a bad feeling about this!!! Meesa getting dizzeeeeee!!"

Jar Jar twirled around, cutting up the pahantoms of Castle Carnage, until he reached the last Phantom, Carnage himself.

"You fool! You cannot win! I will destroy you with a thousand deaths-AAAK!! AAAAAH!"

Carnage tried to be menacing, but he too was stabbed as he lunged at the terrified Gungan.

Jar Jar crouched down, covering his eyes as Carnage attacked, but the sword was still in his hand. Carnage impaled himself and vanished with a scream.

As Carnage was vanquished, all the doors and windows of the castle opened up again, and the sun shined bright into the Hall.

"Wow! Meesa no longer be wanting to be on this ride. This castle be full of cwazzy people!"

Jar Jar grabbed Julia and Mufu and ran out the door.

They both breathed in the fresh air of freedom away from the Nightmare of castle Carnage.

"Oh Jar Jar" Julia held him close "You truly ARE my Hero!"

She kissed him deeply. Jar Jar blushed

"Well, Meesa just being meesa. Youssa are the Angel of my heart."

"You are a bombad warrior!" Julia smiled.

Jar Jar and Julia walked back to her home, hand in hand.


End file.
